If you’ve just found out that you are facing an unplanned pregnancy, adoption might be a path that you are considering. Most women contemplating the possibility of “giving up your baby” feel apprehension and have lots of questions. Know that there are professionals who can help guide you, and that you are not alone in making this brave decision.   

The five steps to putting your baby up for adoption in Oklahoma are:

1. Decide that adoption is the right choice for you..
2. Create an adoption plan and a hospital plan.
3. Select the perfect family for your child.
4. Prepare for placement.
5. Transition into life after adoption

Choosing adoption is a difficult decision for any woman to make, and you want to know that you have made the right decision for you and your baby. This guide will help give you the information that you need and direct you to resources that can help you navigate the unique challenges of your situation.

 If you are ready to talk to an adoption professional, contact us today!

Who Is Available to Help Me Decide if Adoption is Right for Me?

When you reach out to licensed adoption agencies, you can be connected with a unplanned pregnancy counselor who will listen to you, offer you unbiased and objective information about your choices, and assure you that you are in control. They are not there to convince you that you should make any particular choice, but to help you determine the right path for you.

An adoption specialist at the right agency understands that the choice to place your baby for adoption comes from a place of deep love for your child, and this generous decision deserves the utmost respect. They will place you at the center of the adoption process. Some Oklahoma adoption agencies that you may reach out to for this support are:

• American Adoptions
• Lilyfield
• Deaconess Pregnancy and Adoption
• Adoption and Surrogacy Choices of Oklahoma

How to Put Your Baby Up for Adoption in Oklahoma [5 Steps to Placing baby for adoption]

Oklahoma adoption is a five step process, and you will be given control at each stage. When you work with an adoption agency, you will have the help of an adoption specialist who will help you navigate and create your ideal adoption situation. To ensure that you are served well, you will want to partner with an agency who is licensed in Oklahoma, has an exceptional track record, and is available to you at any time of the day. They should place you at the center of your adoption journey, and you should be informed of all developments related to placing your child for adoption. 

Step 1 – Decide That Adoption Is the Right Choice for You

Adoption agencies help women every day to determine which of the three unplanned pregnancy options are right for them. This decision can only be made by you, and no one can tell you what is “right” for you and your baby. While placing your child for adoption is a rewarding journey, there are three options when you have an unintended pregnancy:

1. Parenting
2. Abortion
3. Adoption

Even before you make your decision between these options, you can access free resources and sound advice from professionals who keep your best interests at the forefront. Of course, you can contact an adoption agency to help you think through what adoption would be like for you, but you can also do some of your own searching with the help of the following resources:

• Birth mother testimonials
• Unplanned pregnancy counseling
• A confidential, 24/7 hotline at 1-800-ADOPTION

If you contact a professional today, know that expressing interest in putting a baby up for adoption will not obligate you to go this direction. Furthermore, your information will be kept completely confidential.

Step 2 – Create an Adoption Plan and Hospital Plan [What Choices do I Have When Putting Baby Up for Adoption?]

One of the first things you will do with your adoption specialist after you choose to “give your baby up” for adoption in Oklahoma, is to develop an adoption plan.

An adoption plan outlines each step of your adoption and the describes your preferences and choices along the way. Included is a hospital plan that communicates your needs and desires during your hospital stay. These documents will ensure that you have control over the process and are able to make it what you need it to be.

Some important decisions that you will be able to make are:

• The kind of family/life you would like for your child
• Preferences regarding labor, delivery, and your hospital stay 
• The adoption agreement you would like: open adoption, semi-open adoption, or closed adoption

You might feel some pressure as you create these documents with your adoption specialist. Keep in mind that you can modify some of your initial decisions if you change your mind at another point in your pregnancy. Before you sign the final adoption paperwork, you will retain all parental rights and can add, subtract, or simply change anything in your adoption plan.  

Step 3 – Choose the Perfect Adoptive Family [Placing Your Baby for Adoption in the Perfect Home]

You are the only person qualified to choose the perfect family for your child. You know what you want for their life, you know your reasons for choosing adoption, and you will know when you have found the right family for your child. Most birth mothers agree that this is one of the most important decisions related to placing your baby up for adoption in Oklahoma, and you probably have a lot of questions about this topic.  

If you are wondering if there are parents who want to adopt your baby, the answer is – absolutely, yes. There are countless couples around the nation – and in Oklahoma – who want to grow their family through adoption. Some are same-sex couples, other have struggled with infertility, and still others simply have a heart for adoption. There are many  potential adoptive parents for your baby, and you will get the chance to choose the right family for your child.

Not only are these families willing to adopt, but many are crossing their fingers, praying, and hoping for an adoption opportunity. AJ, an adoptive father, described adoption as “the coolest, most unselfish gift anybody can give you.”

The way choosing your adoptive family will work is your adoption specialist will compare your adoption plan with the Adoption Preference Questionnaire that hopeful adoptive families fill out that describe their ideal adoption situation. From there, they will allow you access to several family profiles that they think might work for you.

When you partner with a national agency, you may have dozens – or even hundreds – of profiles to browse. If you choose a local agency, you could be given only a handful.

You can expect the following from profiles:

• Pictures
• Description of the family lifestyle and personality
• Video interviews with the couple and their family and friends
• Reasons couple wishes to adopt
• The couple’s dreams for an adoptive child

Your adoption specialist will facilitate your first contact with the hopeful adoptive couple that stands out to you. After having a phone conversation with them, where you can ask any questions you have for them, you can decide to go forward with this family or go back to reviewing profiles. Either way, you will be well on your way to placing your baby for adoption in Oklahoma.

Step 4 – Prepare for Placement

After you choose a family, it is really up to you what kind of contact you pursue with them. This period before the birth of your child can be the start of a beautiful relationship between you and your child’s adoptive family. But you can also choose to maintain your privacy and have minimal or no contact. This is completely up to you. 

You can have:

• Regular phone calls with the family
• Exchange letters or emails
• Get together in person
• And more

 The time between choosing the perfect family for your child and placing your baby up for adoption can bring up a lot of emotions. You may have one idea about what you would like your relationship to be during this time, and it may change as you progress in your pregnancy. Your needs are of utmost importance, and your adoption specialist can help you navigate any challenging conversations that may need to happen.

As your hospital stay draws nearer, you will want to make final decisions regarding the details of your labor, delivery, and support system allowed in your room. Sometimes as birth mothers become closer to the hopeful adoptive family, their feelings change about what the role this couple might have on delivery day.

Some decisions that are yours to make are:

• Who cuts the umbilical cord?
• Who is in the room during birth?
• When do you want the baby to be held by the adoptive parents?
• Do you want to nurse the baby?
• Would you like some alone time with your baby?

Step 5 – Transition into Life After Adoption [Post-Placement Support is Available to You]

You are at the center of the adoption process, and you get to make the important decisions, but this does not make it an easy decision. After placement, most women report having feelings of grief, even when they are certain that they have made the right decision. There are emotions that seem to be inevitable for many women, and a healing period often follows the adoption process.

You do not have to go through this experience alone. Your adoption specialist will still be here for you, and your agency will offer you resources to manage your grief and to help you heal.

Another helpful support during this time is the post-adoption agreement. Many women report that having an agreement in place gives them a sense of peace because there is a mutual expectation of the kind of relationship that will be fostered after putting their baby up for adoption.

You Are Never “Giving Up” Your Baby

You may have noticed that on our website, whenever we refer to adoption as “giving your baby up” for adoption, we use quotation marks around giving up. There is a reason for this. While this phrase is commonplace and we want to make sure that we write in a way that connects to our readers, we don’t want to contribute to the belief that choosing adoption is in any way “giving up.”

The choice to adopt is generous because you are giving your baby the chance to have the life you want for them, you are giving a couple the chance to raise a child, and you are giving yourself the chance to choose when (or if) you would like to parent. If you are already a parent, maybe you are choosing to give your other children the life you want for them as well. If you are facing undue stress in your life, maybe you are giving yourself a chance to get on your feet.

Adoption is a selfless choice to make, and the phrase “giving a baby up for adoption” does not properly describe the gift that a woman gives when she places her child for adoption in Oklahoma.

If you would like more information about how to put a baby up for adoption in Oklahoma or need guidance as you consider this option, you can contact us online today to be connected with an adoption professional who can help guide you. You are not alone as you make this decision, nor will you be if you choose to place your baby up for adoption.