How Adoption Works
Emotional Support When Pregnant and Giving Up For Adoption
Adoption is a selfless and rewarding act, but it can be difficult. There are so many complex emotions that come with being pregnant and giving up for adoption. Understanding these emotions and knowing that it’s completely normal to feel this way will help you cope with them.
Most birth mothers go through an adoption grieving process, and there are a number of common emotions that come with it. In this article, we will explore some ways your adoption agency can help you process the complex emotions when you’re pregnant and giving up for adoption.
If you have any questions about how to begin the adoption process, then you can fill out our contact form to get more free information now.
Complex Emotions of Adoption
As you experience the emotions of adoption, you’re not alone. When you work with an adoption agency, they will be there to provide the emotional support you need every step of the way. Placing your baby up for adoption is a challenging process, but the reward will be knowing you made a sacrifice your child will forever be grateful for.
Grief is often one of the most common emotions birth mothers feel when they’re pregnant and giving up for adoption. The process of grieving and healing is how you’ll begin to feel at peace after placing your baby. If you’re considering placing your baby up for adoption but feel a sense of fear, guilt or anger, then understand that these emotions are normal.
Reaching acceptance is the goal of any person going through grief or loss. You’ll know when you’ve reached it when you find peace with your adoption decision.
How to Cope When You’re Pregnant and Giving Up For Adoption
When you’re pregnant and giving up for adoption, you won’t have to go through these feelings alone. Your adoption professional will be there to help navigate you through the complexities of the process. As you start your healing journey, there are four tips that will help you cope with being pregnant and giving up for adoption.
Tip 1: Acknowledge Your Feelings
The pain that comes with being pregnant and giving up for adoption can be intense, but before you can truly begin to heal, you must get in touch with your own feelings. Let yourself feel the emotions of grief, loss and anger as you move through the stages of grief.
Your feelings are completely valid, and you shouldn’t pretend that they don’t exist. Pushing your feelings away can do more damage than you might think. No matter what you’re feeling, remember that it doesn’t mean you’ve made the wrong decision.
In fact, when you’re pregnant and giving up for adoption, you are making the brave and heroic decision to give your baby the best life possible, filled with unconditional love and opportunities. If you find that you’re not as emotional about the adoption, then that’s OK, too.
Remember that these are your feelings and that you have the right to process them in your own way. When you start to acknowledge your feelings and remember the reason for your decision, you will eventually reach a place of acceptance.
“It’s very rough in the beginning, but it does get better,” birth mother Sara says about her adoption experience. “It takes you a while to realize that what you did was the best thing and, regardless of the situation that put you there, there’s nothing to be ashamed of.”
Tip 2: Reach Out To Someone You Trust
While you may be going through the grieving process at your own pace, you don’t have to do it alone. It’s important that you don’t isolate yourself when you’re pregnant and giving up for adoption, as there are people out there who have gone through the same process and know exactly how you’re feeling.
There are always people you can reach out to if you’re feeling alone, including:
- Your adoption professional
- Your child’s parents, depending on your relationship with them
- A counselor or therapist who has experience with adoption
- Close friends and family who are supportive of you and your adoption decision
Working with an adoption agency that offers 24/7 adoption counseling can help you cope with any emotions you may be feeling when you’re pregnant and giving up for adoption. They will be there for you when you need them most and can provide more information about the emotions you might experience during the process.
Tip 3: Focus on Yourself
As you figure out how to cope when pregnant and giving up for adoption, don’t forget to make some time to focus on yourself. Adoption can be an emotional rollercoaster that comes with many ups and downs, but it can also be a time for reflection.
The feelings of placing a child for adoption can be intense, so it’s OK to take some time to pamper yourself and do what you love. Whether that be finding a new hobby or pursuing education, finding something that makes you feel happy can help you process your grief and find acceptance.
“I knew my life did not stop after adoption,” birth mother Julia said about her future after adoption. “It gave me a second chance to pursue my goals and dreams so that I can be a better version of myself and help people along the way. I wanted to show my daughter that I didn’t give up on myself, and most importantly, her.”
Tip 4: If Possible, Maintain Openness
When you’re pregnant and giving up for adoption, maintaining some degree of openness with your child and the adoptive family can help you cope with the complex emotions of adoption. Realizing that your child is happy, loved and safe can ease some of the painful feelings you may be experiencing.
When you’re pregnant and giving up for adoption, knowing how your child is doing can help you feel confident that you’ve made the best choice for you and your baby. In an open adoption, you can stay in contact through:
- Phone calls
- In-person visits
Choosing adoption doesn’t mean giving up the relationship with your child. You are always able to continue to build a relationship with them, if you choose.
If you have any questions about how to begin the adoption process, then you can fill out this contact form to get more free adoption information now. We’d be happy to help you with your adoption journey.
Ready to get started? Contact an adoption agency now to get free information.